When we think of weddings, the thoughts that come to mind are “beautiful”, “romantic”, “everlasting”, “togetherness”. What you wouldn’t associate weddings with are “heartbroken”, “disastrous”, “rejected”, or “let down”.

That is what happened today during our trip to Cancun.

Hubby and I were sitting by the beautiful sandy beach, watching the staff at the resort setting up for a wedding by the ocean. We looked at each other and beamed, remembering our 20th anniversary dinner in Jamaica paid by our daughter and her husband as a special gift. We were so full of love and gratitude for one another. A very special moment in our lives.

We imagined this new couple starting a new life together, wishing them years of happiness and togetherness. We smiled.

Then a few hours later, we noticed the staff were taking down the decorations and putting things away. What just happened? As hubby took a “walk”, he asked the personnel what had happened. It appeared the bride changed her mind and didn’t show up.

I was sad that the nuptials had been cancelled in this manner as I would have enjoyed seeing the wedding from afar.

Yet I’m also glad to know that if this bride-to-be was so unsure of her commitment with who would have been her husband, it was better off to cancel before the “I Do” than to go through the pain and agony of “The Divorce.”

We all enjoy love stories and happy endings, but the reality is that there is no perfect life and relationship. Hubby and I are enjoying 25 years of sharing our lives together. Not every one of those years were great. Some of those years were the most challenging in my life.

What kept us together was the certainty that we were committed to each other and our strongest desire to do what it takes to make our relationship work. Is this the secret to long and fulfilled relationships? Maybe. For us, it is and we continually work on our relationship, keeping our communication open, investing time in each other and ourselves, as well as planning for our future together.

A marriage may start with a commitment and a wedding day, but that is only the beginning. I am sure that family and friends of this now split up couple are heart-broken, angry and upset, but probably not as much as they would have been had they divorced later, when they might have had children and/or a home to divide.

It is always better to say no before the ceremony than to go through a wedding that is not meant to be.
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